Pastor Tullian Tchividjian on dealing with conflict in his church

Pastor Tullian Tchividjian with his grandfather, the great Dr. Billy Graham

As a pastor, it's tempting to think that you're the only one ever to endure hardship for the sake of the Gospel.  (Except for that St. Paul guy ... he had it pretty bad.)
How about this from Pastor Tullian Tchividjian.  He's even a grandson of Billy Graham.  Yes, that Billy Graham.  You think he might be given a pass since he's related to an evangelical giant.

Tullian Tchividjian had to do what most pastors just aren't up to doing - follow a founding pastor of a church.  And not just any founding pastor - a founding pastor with beloved status.  Tullian Tchividjian followed Dr. D. James Kennedy at Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Ft. Lauderdale, FL.

The conflict in the church started out with criticisms about Tchividjian not wearing an academic robe like the late Dr. Kennedy.  Then other critics came out with Tchividjian not preaching politics from the pulpit like the late Dr. Kennedy.  Then the gathering storm...  here is some of it in his own words.

It was tremendously uncomfortable coming to worship every Sunday morning during that time not knowing who liked you and who hated you. There were people in the choir who, when I would stand up to preach, would get up and walk out. People would sit in the front row and just stare me down as I preached. It was extremely uncomfortable. People would grab me in the hallway between services and say, "You're ruining this church, and I'm going to do everything I can to stop you." I would come out to my car and it would be keyed. Some people would stop at nothing to intimidate.
They put petitions on car windows during the worship service. They started an anonymous blog, which was very painful. Here we were trying to build consensus and there's this anonymous blog fueling rumors and lies. The blog almost ruined my wife's life. Anonymous letters were sent out to the entire congregation with accusations and character assassinations. It was absolutely terrible.

...
The shelling got so bad I thought to myself this was a huge mistake. Two churches are ruined now. I could hardly eat, had trouble sleeping, and was continually battling nausea. I felt at the absolute end of myself.
.... 

But then I started thinking, why does this bother me so much? Yes, I have people writing nasty things about me, lying about me, spreading rumors about my team. They're after power. And they're not getting it, and these are the tactics they're using. But why does that bother me so much? I remember saying to God in that moment, "Just give me my old life back." And he said, "It's not your old life you want back. It's your old idols you want back. And I love you too much to give them to you."

LEADERSHIP:  There's been a lot of talk about how the gospel is for Christians. Have we forgotten that the gospel is for pastors too?

Pastor Tullian:  Yes! I mean it has to be for pastors first. There's absolutely no way that our people will experience the liberating now-power of the gospel if the pastor doesn't even know what the liberating now-power of the gospel looks like.  

... You inevitably face crises, slander, unfair criticism, pressure to perform in your professional and personal life. You have to have a model marriage. You've got to have the model children. You've got to be the one logging hours of private prayer every day. I mean there is heavy-duty pressure on pastors to be spiritual giants. What I love about the freeing, liberating power of the gospel is I can stand up on a Sunday morning without fear or reservation and be able to identify my own idols in front of my people. I'll say things like, "I hate to admit this, but part of my motivation for preparing the sermon that I am preaching today is because I want you to think I'm a good preacher. It accentuates my sense of worth." Is that embarrassing to admit? Absolutely! But it's incredibly liberating. I don't have to feel like I have to always be on, that I always have to be performing well, that every sermon's got to be a homerun, that I've got to be modeling perfect piety before all of our people. The pressure's off. Jesus measured up so I wouldn't have to live under the enslaving pressure of measuring up for others. And that's good news. 

Read the rest here.  Lots of great lessons for pastors needing to lead through change especially while weathering conflict.